Slips vs Relapses in Recovery: What’s the difference, and does it matter?

Though there are many folks who make it into recovery without the bumpy road associated with slips and relapses, it’s also very common for folks to struggle with abstaining from mind-changing chemicals. Slips and relapses are something we work through with various clients frequently, and understanding what’s a “relapse” vs a “slip” is a common discussion with newcomers.

In this article, we’ll cover what exactly we mean when we use terms like “slip” and “relapse” (hint: it doesn’t need to be a rigid definition), and how we would advise both the substance user and the family forward as they go through this process.

Let’s start with some quick definitions:

A slip is a brief, isolated return to drug or alcohol use, often described as “unintentional” by the user. By contrast, a “relapse” is a sustained return to addictive behavior and old patterns over a longer period of time.

Slip versus relapses: without being pedantic

When people talk about slips versus relapses, they’re usually simply describing how serious a setback is—and what it means for the recovery journey.

A slip (or lapse) is typically:

• A single or short-term use of alcohol or drugs (one evening, or a weekend)
• Often impulsive or triggered by stress, emotions, or environment
• Followed by regret, awareness, and a desire to get back on track
• Sometimes almost unintentional (wrong place/wrong time without the necessary tools to manage)

A relapse is typically:

• A repeated or ongoing return to substance use
• A shift back into old habits, routines, and thinking patterns
• A breakdown in the recovery plan and support system
• Typically planned, or the acting out of a reservation that has been harbored during the early recovery process

In other words, a slip is like stumbling on a path, while a relapse is turning around and walking back toward full-blown use.

Why slips happen in addiction recovery

As we’ve mentioned in our article on whether relapse is a part of recovery, backsteps in recovery don’t come out of nowhere. They happen when multiple factors build up over a period of time.

This is why we spend so much time in recovery working on developing honesty as a daily practice, whether with a sponsor, a sober peer, a counselor/therapist, or otherwise. As recovering people, we have large “blind spots” that lead us back into old habits, even if the old habits don’t appear destructive on their surface.

Common elements of this “snowball effect” include:

• Small amounts of dishonesty that compound over time
• Isolation from or weakening of our support system
• Overconfidence in our abilities, now that we are sober
• Unresolved fears about the future that knaw at us

The key is to accept this: everyone in recovery has these little things that compound. That’s why it’s “One Day At A Time!”

We’ve even got an acronym for this in recovery: SLIP = Sobriety Loses Its Priority!

We must continue to reset our level of honesty, commit to connect with our higher power of choice, and be of service to others, in order to be free of the compounding effect of little things that kick us “off the beam.”

Why it’s OK to RELAX if you’ve had a slip!

One of our favorite sayings in recovery is “God Writes Straight With Crooked Lines.” In other words: the path toward freedom and sobriety from substance abuse isn’t always linear. In fact, it’s almost never linear!

What’s more common is that we have two steps forward, one step back, three steps forward, two steps back, etc. While we certainly don’t want to enable bad behavior, we also understand that staying sober is hard work, and long-term recovery as a goal can be daunting to the newcomer.

The point: If you’ve had a slip – RELAX! Many people before you have gone through this experience, and you won’t be the last. The important thing now is to take the necessary relapse prevention steps to stop yourself from spiraling into a full-blown self-destructive relapse.

When a slip turns into a relapse

Not every slip becomes a relapse. Likewise, not every relapse starts as a “slip.”

What’s important to understand is that a slip is not a death sentence for your recovery. Many folks, once they’ve used once, will “slip” into a pattern of craving, dishonesty, and ultimately more use which can become an extended period of time using drugs again – the very definition of a relapse.

In order to keep a slip from becoming a full-blown relapse:

• Don’t hide your slip – it’s important to be honest about it as soon as soon as possible
• Don’t let the fear of being judged stop you from coming back – we have a saying in the rooms, “we don’t shoot our wounded!” (Most of us have had setbacks – there’s no reason to stay out due to being ashamed)
• Avoid stepping fully back into old using social circles and routines
• Don’t start skipping meetings, counseling appointments, or IOP days – the days you want to attend the least are the ones you need to attend the most!

Relapse occurs when the behavior becomes consistent enough that it resembles a return to addiction rather than a momentary lapse.

We often tell families that the difference between a slip and a relapse isn’t just the substance, it’s the mindset. A slip says, “Something went wrong.” A relapse says, “I’m going back to the old way.”

Warning signs before a relapse occurs

Relapses rarely happen suddenly. They often follow a predictable pattern.

Common warning signs include:

• Romanticizing past drug or alcohol use
• Withdrawing from support groups, sponsors, home groups, or counseling
• Changes in sleep, mood, or behavior
• Increased stress associated with rebuilding a life in recovery (see our article on why addicts relapse when things are good!)
• Skipping therapy, meetings, or self-care routines

Many times, it’s those around you who will notice the pattern and point it out first, before you notice it yourself. It’s important to be open to the suggestions of others in recovery, especially those whose opinion we have respected in the past.

How to respond to a slip in a healthy way

A slip doesn’t have to derail recovery. In fact, it can become a powerful learning moment.

Helpful responses include:

• Acknowledge the slip and accept that you’ve had a setback – this is OK
• Reach out to your support system (sponsor, peers, counselors) as soon as possible
• Revisit your home group and trusted meetings
• Take immediate steps to return to recovery

A setback such as this can be the learning experience that makes recovery “click.” Right after a slip is NOT the time to give up!

What to do after a relapse

A relapse can feel devastating … but it’s not the end of the journey!

Key steps after a relapse include:

• Seeking professional support or addiction treatment program
• Rebuilding routines and accountability
• Addressing underlying mental health issues
• Reconnecting with supportive relationships
• Adjusting the recovery plan to prevent future relapses

We often tell people in recovery that progress is not erased by a relapse. The skills, insights, and resilience developed during sobriety still exist.

If you’re thinking about next steps after a setback, our guide on most important steps to recovery can provide additional perspective.